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January 26, 2006
The way I figure it,
I can lose 50 pounds in six, seven days tops.
How?
Simple.
By taking three Hoodia capsules daily, I will lose the urge to eat.
Mid mornings and late afternoons, two carb blockers for snacks.
Before I go to bed, two tablespoons of SlimSleep and I am off to bed while losing inches. Four tablespoons and you can trim at least a size off of me a week.
Five pounds a day with the Hoodia, four pounds a week with the carb blockers, and minimum ten pounds with the SlimSleep = 50 pounds.
My next endeavor will be to grow my newly cut hair (7 inches gone = 1 pound from the scale!) by overdosing on Biotin, Vitamin E, and gelatin. I will let you know how that goes. In the meantime, don't try this at home. You could sprout hair from every orifice.
Posted by Tish at January 26, 2006 09:12 PM
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Comments
And then when you quit reading pop-up ads, you will be 98 pounds and hungry. Or maybe 96 if you take your shoes off.
Posted by: old horsetail snake at January 26, 2006 10:35 PM
oh hell, why do all that. just be a weight watchers queen with me. :)
Posted by: gwen at January 26, 2006 11:46 PM
you worry me.
Posted by: meeta at January 26, 2006 11:48 PM
Much as I would love to lose weight INSTANTLY those quick reducing things scare me to death. Ephedra anyone ;-)
Posted by: LisaBinDaCity at January 27, 2006 06:57 AM
You're kidding, right?? The South Beach Diet worked for me; 15# the first two weeks. And there's plenty of good stuff to eat - you just quit the bad sugars and carb. Hey, but you've got that caffeine thing going .... that stimulates insulin production which triggers that endless sugar - craving cycle. Check it out. I bought the book on CD and listened in the car and my office .... good luck. ;)
Posted by: Mike (exscientia) at January 27, 2006 11:40 AM
As I age, I'm doing that anyway (the sprouting hair thang).
Posted by: Skunkfeathers at January 27, 2006 01:24 PM
TV's off hours certainly are filled with magic potions and lotions, not to mention those hard bodies selling machines of all sorts. They all have one thing in common and it ain't weight loss, is it?
(I'm not knocking S. Beach or Weight Watchers, legitimate stuff, just the far more exotic stuff like Tish mentions.)
Non-related but just as entertaining (not) are those sweet philanthropists who, having made all the money they can use, now want to share their secret with us. If we'd just send them 10 bucks or a 100, they'll share it. Happily.
Posted by: Paul of York at January 27, 2006 02:53 PM